Thursday, September 11, 2008

Wise Guy Comments

Intelligence, Wisdom, Experience, Reliability

My definitions without first having consulted a dictionary:
Intelligence: willingness and ability to learn without being taught
Wisdom: willingness and ability to do the right thing
Experience: having made the mistakes, than applying them to improve one’s reaction to events
Reliability: accepting a commitment and following through
I am not talking absolutes here. All have a degree of measure. There is a lot we could argue about these definitions, but this is a monologue, so argument is not an option. However, you may leave comments.


I have read, and continue to read so-called “forums” on certain subjects. It can be any subject, but in our context it is CB, chastity, FLR, D/S, etc. The human mind has nearly infinite capability to assess something instantly, which computers have not, and may never be able to duplicate. For example, reading one of these “forums” a person presents some problem or an example of what he wants to elaborate. The posting is full of emoticons and texting shortcuts. There are mistypes and spelling errors. Grammar is not a major ingredient. Superfluous or missing phrases are the rule. The writer of this text is not quite what I would call intelligent. One might argue that the writer is simply uneducated. True, but why? One can become educated through self-motivation. There are books on many subjects.


Wisdom, experience, and reliability, are not easy to comprehend by a mind that produces such drivel. To that mind these concepts are foreign. Yet, he has an agenda. He can tell you or me, how it should be done, and how wrong we are when we are different. He makes rules. He is not a bad person, just limited.

I overcame some of these problems earlier in my life, but I am still struggling with the wisdom part. I don’t remember having made wise guy comments on purpose in the Blogosphere lately. However, in my self-education in female led relationship I was at a point where I could say something that sounded like wisdom. Of course, after I thought about it, I knew that it was just an opinion. Wisdom is different.

Now that I have attained wisdom, I can say, “A person is a poor judge of deciding whether he has attained wisdom.” I know, I am getting wrapped around that proverbial axle here. My point is, that whether or not I am wise, another person will decide.


Not one human will live long enough to claim to be an expert in our subject. At least not by first hand experience. Collecting case histories from people with some experience helps, but they need to be organized, and then analyzed. And there is the rub. We tend to just form a conclusion, and be done with it.

Aside from being so self-effacing and humble, I have a few points to make. When I began with this topic that covers FLR, WLM, D/S, etc., I had some notion of where I was heading. What I lacked was the experience (well, maybe wisdom too). Sure, I read books, and later blogs. But one can become an academic pain in the ass with too much learning but no real life experience. See any of the thousands of university professors for an example. It was not until I began to experience, or put into practice my liking of a female led relationship that I had actually accumulated experience. Sure, it was all based on sex, but that is how most men are wired. Where we separate men from boys is “the commitment to serve a deserving woman.” Oh, there is the word, “commitment”. That comes after a lot of learning, and most of us never get there.


I already accumulated the ammunition via having read all the available female domination books. I knew that I had an affinity to serve women all my life, but the opportunity did not come up blatantly. I went through a tumultuous period of my marriage with my dear wife, and made a life changing decision that had nothing to do with FLR or D/S. It was not what kicked me in the butt, so to speak, to realize that I wanted to serve her.

My breakthrough came by a lot of self-analysis. Being dominated in the bedroom is great, but it requires a self-sacrificing service from my partner. My need to be dominated that way was just my need to dominate her into doing my thing. I had that eureka moment.

Not that all of this is clear, even now, just that I understand one thing: if I need to serve, then I must not anticipate or desire service in turn. Recognition of my service, yes, but not reciprocation. Oh my! Isn’t this profound?

Don’t think that I have become the perfect servant. I still have, and experience renewal of black and blue marks on my ass for failing. I love the life, so this is not a complaint. It is, however, a demonstration of my trying to improve the relationship that will never achieve perfection.

Why? I can name several reasons:

I am not truly committed to FLR
I am selfish and lazy
I am cheap
I am easily offended
I am never satisfied
I am fickle
I don’t pay attention

In other words, I am human. I may be better than the next guy, but not perfect. The road to perfection is challenging, but I have the rests of my life to walk it.

Post Script

I don't mean to be unfair, but I feel that I should present at least one example of lack of intelligence. This person has a fair vocabulary, but does not quite know what to do with it. Yet he thinks that just words alone will carry the message. In a way they do, but they also raise a flag: "Warning, there is no brain behind this!" This is not really the worst I have seen.

"recently i received a few websites to visit that were given to me by a couple masters/mistresses on here who were kind enough to take the time 2 try and help me figure out if the life of a slave was really for me,in these articles was a detailed list of outlines and expectations of what life as a born slave would be like,now before i read these articles all i knew is that i had these desires towards servitude ever since i was a young lad,and that in all my relationships and all of my bdsm adventures(4 lack of a better word)i had never met any one who enjoyed it as much (or as deeply)as i did,but i never considered myself a born slave,but as i read these outlines of rules/behaviour etc ifailed to find even one aspect of slavery that wasnt exactly what ive been looking for and wanting,this is where my title to this board comes into play because it was one off the most scary realizations that ive ever been struck with,is this my calling i asked?im left wondering if it is normal to be overwhelmingly happy yet deeply intimidated at the same time,if this is hat i was "meant"to do shouldnt i be over joyed and nothing else ?im struggling with where this intimidation/nervousness is coming from,what does one do when they realize their destiny/fate,now that i know where im meant to be,how do i get there?is that it?the source of my uncertainty? so im left wondering if anyone else has experienced this same --juxtaposition-so to speak of emotions after theyve found something that feels so rightand whether or not this is a good or a bad thing,mabey this is what pre wedding jitters are like perhaps,any way any thoughts abought this important stage of self realization in my lifewould be greatly appreciated,and i cant help but wonder where i go from here,thank u all 4 your thoughts sincerely ..."

I almost feel that he faked the atrocious style of writing. I think this because he has a good display of vocabulary. It also seems that he may have forced the writing to just run on to disguise his true self. If so, he has done a good job. Nevertheless, it is a fair representation of the prose out there.


doll said...


this isn't a comment for the blog but a thank you from me to you. I really do appreciate the time you are taking to slowly read my blog. As you would understand from writing yours a lot of thought and pleasure goes into most posts. It is really a nice feeling for me to know that the older posts can still bring pleasure to those wise enough to look.


Susan's Pet said...

Dear Lady,

The pleasure is indeed mine.