Friday, November 13, 2009

Who You Callin' a Lady?

A woman by any other name is not necessarily a lady

Before I begin to dissect women, I want to give an idea of the terminology surrounding sexes. I will not be exhaustive in definitions, since anyone can look up the terms in his favorite reference site or book. I will just pick the one that seems to suit my purpose for the moment, and leave others for later.

Pertaining To Men, But Not Exclusively


“A man whose conduct conforms to a high standard of propriety or correct behavior”. I may act gentlemanly from time to time, alas, I am not one. I would love to be, but at this point in my life I can’t justify the effort.
“Human adult male”. I am one.

“A rope, chain, rod, or wire attached to something as a brace or guide”. Well, at least by Merriam-Webster. More appropriately, “A mostly adult man with some redeeming qualities”. Yeah, I have been called one often.

“A member of a group having common characteristics”. You know, pair of balls, needing a shave, etc. Right. I have them all so far.

“Penis”. Need I say more? I feel like one from time to time, but I give myself more credit than to admit to being one full time.

“An unlikable small-minded person”. Sheesh, I have been called that, but I don’t think I deserved it.

Well, you can give your definition based on those whom you know. I know I have been called that, but, in my opinion, I never deserved it (well, maybe in very narrow circumstances). Then again, there are other opinions.

As you can see, the credentials and worthiness based on the above definitions range from “just fine” to, well, you know

Pertaining To Women

I will be slightly less irreverent defining the female gender, although the above definitions certainly apply from time to time.


“A woman of refined manners and good breeding”. You will recognize one when you see her.

“A woman of refinement and gentle manners”. She is close to a gentlewoman. However, especially of late, the word has assumed a meaning much less than original, and no more than female. Alas, it is now expected that a man calls a female lady even if he means, “you stupid uneducated moronic bitch”. It is a shame, for there still are ladies around, and the honorific should be used with care.

“Adult female person”.

“A female servant or employee, an informal friendly, or demeaning meaning of woman”.

“Woman of character marked by lack of restraint, delicacy, or subtlety”. This may be verging on archaic usage, but I think it is a good description.

“A malicious, spiteful, or overbearing woman”. Even when I feel like it, I seldom use this. I just don’t have it in me.
There are others, and some covered under “Pertaining To Men ...” may apply, but I think that I have covered the spectrum.

Where Do You Fit?

Male or female, I am curious about where you think yourself to be.

Let not this be a wish or a feeling. Rather, examine your behavior in normal circumstances, and rate yourself. Is there anything you would like to change about yourself?

Do you care how others classify you? I am not talking about isolated instances when some person with irrational expectations calls you names. That is not what you are. What you are is when you are alone and admit to yourself how you would behave under some circumstances.

Let’s hear it, dolls and guys, girls and boys, ladies and gentlemen! But please, remain civil in your comments.

1 comment:

doll said...

I'd like to think that I was a broad but unfortunately I think I am a little too ladylike and precious to be such a fine specimen of powerful womanhood. So I shuttle somewhere between a girl and a gentlewoman.