Misogyny

You may call me "simplistic", or even "simple" for that matter. I am not a psychologist, so what I propose here is not authoritative, just genuine: anyone who hates women has a few loose bricks... Just like those of you out there who hate cats, or fat men or queers (sorry, in behalf of political correctness, I meant to say "gays"), hatred is just irrational. Yes, one can develop hatred to some people based on being the victim of repeated abuse. I would call that rational hatred. This is something else.

One submissive man on his blog was saying that his Mistress “… believes most subs are truly misogynists at heart because its their expectation that they see a Domme as a mean to their own end.” Mistress, according to the writer is a retired pro Domme. Hmm.

This assumed belief begs to be examined in the light of rational reasoning. It is also open to heated debate of extreme points of view.

There are men who hate women, so some men who visit pro Dommes are misogynists. There are women who hate men, so there are pro Dommes who hate men. But hate is not a requirement for the relationship. Rather, there is a symbiotic relationship between them similar to physical therapy, psychological therapy, carpet cleaning, plumbing, prostitution, etc.

If this Mistress does indeed believe what the man says, it appears that she has a low opinion of men who visit her for professional services. Or maybe men in general. Maybe she hates men. Is there a word for "hating men"? Going with the reasoning of this particular “retired Domme” we can also conclude “all pro Dommes hate men.” This is just as absurd as saying, “All subs who visit pro Dommes hate women.”

The “pro Domme–submissive client relationship” is benign. There is no need to scratch at it like one would scratch at a scab. I would love to get a treatment of female domination as much as any man, but I would not consider visiting a pro Domme for that purpose. Yet I see nothing wrong with another man doing so. There are situation in which that is the only way that a man’s primal need can be satisfied. He may be in a totally committed relationship that does not provide that need. Should he sacrifice the satisfaction of his need? What if it was the woman who needed such, and the man could not provide it? Should she just grin and bear it?

I don’t criticize men who use a pro Domme's services. And I definitely don’t believe that these men do so because they are misogynists. A professional Domme may have gone into business for the monetary rewards, for sexual thrill, or for revenge against earlier offense. It could be a combination. I condone the first two. The last, however, needs to be treated. Hate in any context is not a constructive attitude.